The Seven Cs

1. Be Considerate, Close Your Mouth, and Open Your Ears

How often do you interrupt your child when they are sharing their feelings?

o A) Always, I feel the need to correct or advise them.

o B) Often, I struggle to listen without reacting.

o C) Occasionally, but I try to let them speak.

o D) Rarely, I focus on listening fully.

2. Compromise

When was the last time you compromised with your co-parent on an important decision for your child?

o A) I can’t remember—it’s been a long time.

o B) We tried but often end up arguing.

o C) Recently, but it’s not always easy.

o D) We regularly find ways to meet in the middle.

3. Communicate

How clear are you in communicating plans, schedules, and updates to your co-parent?

o A) I often avoid communicating because it leads to fights.

o B) I try, but it usually turns into conflict.

o C) Mostly clear, but there are occasional misunderstandings.

o D) Very clear and proactive in communicating all details.

4. Be Consistent

How often do your rules change based on your mood or stress level?

o A) All the time, I’m too overwhelmed to be consistent.

o B) Often, especially when I’m stressed.

o C) Sometimes, but I try to stay consistent.

o D) Rarely, I focus on stability for my child.

5. Child First

Do you make decisions based on what’s best for your child or what’s easiest for you?

o A) Mostly what’s easiest for me—I’m exhausted.

o B) Often a mix of both, depending on the day.

o C) I try to put my child first but sometimes fall short.

o D) Always prioritize my child’s well-being.

6. Get Counseling When Needed

Have you sought outside help, such as counseling, to support your child during this transition?

o A) No, I don’t think it’s necessary.

o B) I’ve considered it but haven’t taken action.

o C) Yes, but we haven’t been consistent with it.

o D) Yes, and it’s made a positive difference.

Forgiveness for YOU

7. How much resentment do you still hold toward your ex-spouse?

o A) A great deal—it affects my daily life.

o B) Quite a bit, but I’m working on it.

o C) Some, but I’m actively trying to let go.

o D) Very little, I’ve mostly moved past it.

8. How often do you forgive yourself for mistakes you make as a parent?

o A) Never, I’m constantly beating myself up.

o B) Rarely, I’m too hard on myself.

o C) Sometimes, but it’s a struggle.

o D) Often, I’m learning to be kind to myself.

Their 3@3

9. Have you proactively reached out to the parents of your child's three closest friends to inform them of your divorce?

o A) No, I don’t see the need to involve others at this stage.

o B) I’ve thought about it, but I’m unsure how to approach it.

o C) I’ve reached out to one or two, but not all three.

o D) Yes, I’ve informed all three parents and asked them to support my child if needed.

10. How comfortable do you feel discussing your child’s feelings and fears with them?

o A) Very uncomfortable—I avoid it.

o B) Somewhat uncomfortable—I don’t know what to say.

o C) Fairly comfortable, but it’s hard sometimes.

oD) Very comfortable—I encourage open conversations.

Navigating the News

11. Have you planned how to share major changes with your child (e.g., moving, new relationships)?

o A) No, I usually just wing it.

o B) Sometimes, but it often leads to stress.

o C) Yes, but I could improve my approach.

o D) Yes, I always plan and deliver news thoughtfully.

Conflict Resolution

12. How often do you and your co-parent argue in front of your child?

o A) Frequently—our child often hears our conflicts.

o B) Sometimes, but we try to avoid it.

o C) Rarely, we usually step aside to resolve issues.

o D) Never, we make sure to keep conflicts private.

13. Are you able to work together with your co-parent on financial decisions for your child?

o A) No, it’s a constant source of tension.

o B) We try, but it’s difficult to agree.

o C) We manage to compromise occasionally.

o D) Yes, we’re aligned on financial matters.

Two Home Harmony

14. How do you support your child’s transition between two homes?

o A) I leave it up to them to adjust.

o B) I try, but I’m often overwhelmed.

o C) I provide some support, but it’s not consistent.

o D) I actively plan to make transitions smooth and stress-free.

15. How do you address your child’s social life after the divorce?

o A) I don’t have the energy to focus on that.

o B) I try to encourage them but could do better.

o C) I’m fairly supportive but could be more proactive.

o D) I prioritize helping them maintain strong friendships.

Parental Dating

16. Have you considered how introducing a new partner will affect your child?

o A) No, I just introduce them when I’m ready.

o B) I worry about it but haven’t planned a strategy.

o C) I’m careful but could be more thoughtful.

o D) I’ve planned a gradual, child-centered approach.